Ah, the call of nature beckons me. I prefer to hasten to my beloved village toilet. Here it is, my treasure. Behold the plush, downy seat, akin to a fur throne. Such bliss for the hindquarters, such solace and comfort it provides, I am truly enamored. And you, toilet dullard, shall situate yourself beneath me. Open your mouth, receive my excrement and urine. You shall reside in this wooden lavatory, ingesting all feces from me and my compatriots. Indeed, you have become a living receptacle, a connoisseur of excrement.