My paypig is set to arrive today! He has a fixation with sneakers, eagerly cleaning them with his tongue. He will willingly empty his wallet for the privilege, and I demand every cent he has to offer, the loser that he is! As I wear the sneakers, I will kick him in the face before allowing his tongue to touch them! He must perform well, as the sole is quite dirty. I will count each lick as money, and if he fails to perform to my standards, he will be kicked again!