Savor the Experience: Shit, Your New Diet

Welcome to your new existence, human toilet. Your life’s purpose is to serve me, your master. You will wait in the corner, ready to receive my piss or shit at a moment’s notice. Open wide, for you will consume everything I give you without complaint. You are my property, and you will follow my commands, day or night. When I step in shit, you will eagerly lick my sneakers clean. During my menstrual cycle, you will drink my urine. All of my shit will enter your mouth, so get used to it. Embrace your new life, toilet bowl.

My shit is too voluminous for your mouth, but I know you crave to consume every piece. I wear corks in my ass to expand my bowel movements, resulting in massive, unmanageable piles of shit. Look at this enormous ball of feces, it’s too large to fit in your mouth. But I can see the desire in your eyes, longing to taste every last bit. Savor the experience, for this is your new diet.

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