I am a charming kitty, crawling on all fours. I have an urgent need to defecate. Today, I am a mischievous kitty, and I don’t feel like using the litterbox. I yearn for a more thrilling location! This elegant glass table seems like an ideal spot to relieve myself. I attempt to maneuver my sizable bottom over the glass, but the table is too high. With great clumsiness, I try various positions to align myself correctly. Finally, I find the right stance – a semi-squat, with my ample derriere hovering above the table. The mirror reflects my exquisite feminine form, as I savor the sensation of pushing. A massive, thick log emerges with a moan, and my eyes flutter with delight. I gaze at my creation, awestruck – what a sizable turd! I’ve never seen a cat produce such a large poop before! I sniff it, commenting on its potent odor. I offer you an up-close view of the colossal excrement, marveling at its size and texture. But what now? Well, I am merely a cat, unable to clean up this mess, so I shall leave it for the humans to discover.