In the Scarlet Kingdom, the first rule is absolute: shoes must always be impeccably polished by a tongue. Upon entering my dungeon, slaves must obey without question, and the chosen footwear for cleaning is of no consequence to them. Today, my flip flops are in need of thorough cleaning, and I find the slave’s previous attempt less than satisfactory. I scold him harshly, using his tongue and body as a doormat to rub my flip flops clean. The dirt proves difficult to remove, and I have other matters to attend to. I leave the slave, now a four-legged puppy, next to the sofa to continue the cleaning while I relax and check my emails on my phone.